Yesterday, we spent the afternoon at the driving range in awe of Chaz's golf skills, sucking on Mountain Dew and chewing on Slim Jims to our heart's delight.
This morning, my reluctant crew woke up at 7:00 and headed to Phelp's lake to see about some crappie. What we ended up with was some bass.
Chloe was the first one to pop out of bed and the most positive on the way there. Caleb was making sure he could take a nap when we get back and Chaz wanted a donut. Chris kept checking the time and bemoaning the likelihood of it already being too late to catch anything, while I was just happy to get to wear my new galoshes
"I mean I have only caught one fish my whole life," Chloe reminded us. This comment became extremely important half an hour later as Chloe's pole was fixed and she went out with her brothers to walk the pond. I waited for Chris to thread a lure for me and my bad eyes when we heard her screaming, "Help! I got a fish! Help! It's a fish!"
I ran her way, but Caleb beat me to her and walked her back dragging the fish onto the shore. She was HUGE! Right as I arrived on the scene, the fish flopped about and broke the line.
And like in the movies, in a split second, remembering Chloe's lamention of the morning, I screamed,"Nooooooooooo!" jumped into the water and tackled the fish, capturing her between my thighs. I tried to pick her up by the tail which was between my legs, but she tried to fin me. I couldn't reach around to her mouth because I was afraid she'd wiggle loose. Everyone was still trying to figure out what what was going on, including me, and possibly the fish, when I finally formed words.
"Chris, I am sitting on a fish."
Still confused,he grabbed the fish by the mouth and I sloshed out of the water to shake off. I realized it was cold and the lower half of my body was soaked, including the inside of my new galoshes. We oohed and aaahed and laughed and retold the story five times before Chris handed me my pole and we commenced to fishing.
Thirty minutes later I felt my phone in my back pocket, but no longer felt my toes. I trudged back to the car, took off my boots and jeans. I placed my phone in pieces on the dash to dry out.
In the car, in my panties, T-shirt, scarf and hat, thawing out in the morning sun, I watched Caleb help Chaz take a fish off his line and add it to the stringer. I leaned back, grabbed a cake donut, sipped some cold coffee, read a bit of Through Painted Deserts and un-second guessed my decision to have a Spring Break Re-do.
Holy banana, woman! You sat on a fish?!
I couldn't stop laughing- that's great!
Post a Comment