Tuesday, October 4, 2011

The Reluctant No Home-School Momma, Part 4: Toot-a-ledge

My kids rallied against my pouting at the end of last year and re attending school outside the home this year. Mainly because Chris decided we needed two incomes, and quite honestly, I think he wants more of my attention. (Which isn't gonna happen if I get a job, because I tend to disappear when I am overloaded. But hey, he'll figure that out AGAIN in a couple of months when I've engulfed myself into some new endeavor.)
We found a school for Caleb and Chloe that holds classes four hours a day, four days a week and it happens to be walking distance from where we moved. AMAZING.
Chaz went back to Notre Dame for the Vocational Program and already has a job at a law firm, stocking the drink stations and will be volunteering at Camp Summit as an assistant counselor in November! He calls me five times a day still, but he's so cheerful and full of confidence most of the time, well, except for the recent face plant into the air vent which garnered him a touchdown and two stitches, I look forward to hearing about his day.
Handsome, huh?

I did not know how quickly I would have to get un-afaraid about Chaz's new life without me.
I did know, that it was time. No matter how many nightmares I had, I sucked it up and let him stand by the busy street to wait for the Dart Handi-Ride, BY HIMSELF and go to work a zillion miles in the air and only asked once who was responsible for making sure her gets evacuated in an emergency.

I did not know how much I would miss my two little kids the whole 16 hours they are away at school.
I did know I was in need of help with higher maths and sciences.

I didn't know how long homework would take them-forever. ( I still get to help a LOT!)
I did know they would work harder for someone who isn't their mom.

I did know they would make new friends.
I didn't know they would be of the opposite sex and they all might want to hang out somewhere public, without me, or any adult. (I don't know how I didn't know that. Straight up denial, I guess.)

I didn't know how much I'd enjoy making cookies and veggie trays and hot pastrami and cheeses and sweet tea right when they came home for lunch.
Algebra Cookies!

I do know that I am already mourning this part of the day, when they come home at noon with the stories of the moment and I sit on the other side of the counter, shove food towards them and listen. They still WANT to talk to me. Yay!

I know, I know. Everything changes. But changes are coming so fast lately my face is starting to twitch  . . . . .again;) I am working hard to make my heart not beat so fast so I can still hear God whisper in my ear: Don't give up, It will be okay, I"M the rescuer, Be present, GO TO SLEEP!

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